The Washington Post has officially become a parody of itself.
On Sunday, the anti-Trump, anti-police, anti-public safety rag published a story declaring Washington, D.C., a safe place to live and work.
The purpose was obvious — to oppose President Donald Trump after he spent the weekend railing against the city’s rampant violence.
On Monday, Trump announced a federal takeover of the city’s police department and deployment of National Guard troops to curb violent crime.
Trump said on Truth Social that the capital had become “one of the most dangerous cities anywhere in the World” and vowed to make it “one of the safest.”
The Washington Post’s editors, determined to prove him wrong, rolled out selective statistics about declining homicide and juvenile arrest rates since 2023.
But the real punchline came midway through their own article.
In the piece with three bylines, Olivia George, John D. Harden, and Jenny Gathright delivered one of the most iconic self-owns in modern memory.
The trio of reporters found one person so confident that the district is safe that they were afraid to even offer their name.
Do you still buy newspapers?
“This is a safe city, but overhearing and witnessing gang threats and then watching the camera footage of the thuggery is disturbing,” the opinionated resident told The Washington Post anonymously.
Why did this person speak without providing a name?
Per George, Harden, and Gathright, the person was “speaking on the condition of anonymity over concerns of personal safety.”
You read that right.
D.C. is so safe, according to The Washington Post, that the people claiming it’s safe are too scared to give their names.
The same resident described a “crowd of teens” roaming the street, checking for unlocked cars and things to steal.
It’s the kind of cognitive dissonance only the woke media could pull off.
Once considered a serious newspaper, it now functions as a political newsletter for the left, where public safety, economic reality, and honest obituaries for dead terrorists each come second to political spin.
If their own “safe city” source won’t speak on the record for fear of retaliation, maybe — just maybe — the city isn’t that safe after all.
But admitting that would mean agreeing with Trump.
And at The Washington Post, that’s the one crime in D.C. you can’t commit.
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